Satan's Gift to Me: Sadly, Not Metallica

Apparently Jesus forgot about me these last two weeks, and instead Lucifer has decided to make himself my new best friend. And what do BFFs do? Thats right, buy each others' love! Except evil's idea of a "welcome to the friendship" gift is more like a trip to the DMV or a root canal. For me on this joyous occasion, I got a wonderous computer virus. A completely debilitating virus calling itself Worm.Winsky.Net.32 and successfully annoying me into Sylvia Plath-like tendencies.

Daft Punk - Technologic

Internet has been sparce, but I am finally back online with an interum computer. Its an amazing substitute until the priest they have on staff over at Dell is able to exorcise all evil from my previous piece of machinary. Don't pull a Linda Blair on me Inspiron 600m. I'm so behind and have so much music to share/review/dismiss, but since there can only be one Lois Lane super-reporter (and sadly only one Clark Kent), I'll try and get my stories out as time permits.

Before I left for school I was watching the free premium channels with crazy ass movies like London, starring Chris Evans, Jessica Biel, and husband numero tres, Jason Statham. Someone was doing a lot of drugs when they wrote this; I can tell because if I was forced to watch it again I would clearly have to be under the influence of something to make it through. Basically it was a lot of existential bullshit, characters doing braindead amounts of coke, and a completely depressing and might I add, unrealistic view of relationships. The one bright spot was the use of The Perishers "Nothing Like You and I" (from the 2003 album, Let There Be Morning) in a particularly "pivotal" scene. I forgot for about ten seconds how much I love this song; how eerily it makes me excited to have my heart broken from the kind of all-out relationship that leaves one or both parties destroyed.

The Perishers - Nothing Like You and I

This past weekend I chick-flicked it up with the girls and saw 27 Dresses. Say what you want Rolling Stone (and every critic out there), I loved this movie. I think I was laughing 65% of the time, while the remainder of the film was spent worthwhile-y oogling James Marsden and the most gorgeous smile I've ever seen. Music selection was interesting to say the least - somehow incorporating Elton John's "Bennie and the Jets" (in the best scene of the movie, hands down), with Chaka Khan, Bloc Party, Common (ft. Lily Allen), Justice, The Turtles, and many more.

I mean, how gorgeous is he?

Elton John - Bennie and the Jets

Common ft. Lily Allen - Drivin' Me Wild

Chaka Khan - Love Has Fallen on Me

Bloc Party - So Here We Are

Pray for my computer, its in someone's hands. Not mine. And there is a good possibility that 13,456 songs will be deleted in order to restore the registry keys. Can you understand now why Lucifer should never be your Secret Santa? I still have hope though. And what puts me in a more optimistic mood than The Kinks? I'm not sure, Lola asked me to Come Dancing...

The Kinks - Catch Me Now I'm Falling

Peace love and records

Marriage Proposal # 137: James Mercer

The Shins were all over the critic's best lists this year - and rightly so. Wincing the Night Away was top notch indie pop. Lead singer James Mercer has been on my radar for a long time now. Oh, Inverted World is amazing, but it wasn't until I heard the beautiful vocals of "Pink Bullets" (off 2003's Chutes Too Narrow) that I was truly hooked. Zach Braff really put the band on the map by including Shins tracks "Caring is Creepy" and "New Slang" on the infamous indie soundtrack to his film, Garden State. They couldn't have been more appropriately poignant in the soul-searching story.

Despite a slew of amazing credentials, my favorite Mercer showcase to date was his 2004 in-studio performance on Portland's radio show "Station to Station." Not only is he unbelievably kind and personable, but his vocals sound even more amazing live and stripped. I know its my 137th proposal to date, but James Mercer, will you marry me?

James Mercer - Caring is Creepy (Live on Station to Station)

James Mercer - Young Pilgrims (Live on Station to Station)

James Mercer - Pink Bullets (Live on Station to Station)

My Desktop Wallpaper (James is the joyous one, second from left)

PS. I just bought my tix for The Virgins show at the Glass House in Pomona. March 8 can't come soon enough! My devious plan to meet the band includes dressing like a complete slut and hanging around their tour bus after the set with some sort of alcoholic beverage or contraband. The Glass House is such a small venue that artists kick it right outside afterwards. Maybe if I flash one of them they'll grace me with a pic or short interview. I have no reservations in that case.

Speaking of concerts I would like to extend an invitation to anyone in SoCal this semester - there are so many amazing bands coming to the GH. Rogue Wave will take the stage tomorrow and The Blakes on Thursday (crying because I can't go), but I'm looking for peeps who might want to see Pinback (Thursday, Feb 7), Nada Surf (Friday, March 21), Built to Spill (Saturday, March 22), or Tokyo Police Club (Tuesday, March 25). All shows are very reasonably priced and should be amazing!

Check out the full schedule and tix information HERE

Music Collects Social Security Too

I've spent the last week pissed at Disney for three reasons. 1.) Their DVD "Vault"; from which they decide to periodically take movies "out of" and make them available to the general public for sale. Bullshit, Disney. If I want to see clocks and candlesticks serve dinner while singing I should be able to go drop the ridiculous 30 dollars you charge for Beauty and the Beast. I don't get to see Jerry Orbach on Law and Order anymore, and his animation voice over credits are limited to one film - one film you refuse to sell me. 2.) Hannah Montana. NO ONE is worth $15,000/ticket live. 3.) I forget because I'm currently too pissed about the first two. But whatever it is, it was legit.

Beauty and the Beast - Be Our Guest

Disney's method of moving movies in and out of retirement is apparently a staple of the music industry as well. I was unaware that records could collect SS, move to Florida, and stock up on prunes. So I was definitely surprised when KEXP announced they were only offering their third live-in-studio album until December 31, 2007.

Luckily I bought my copy a few weeks before, but I was bummed to hear other people wouldn't have the opportunity to hear these excellent live recordings from artisits like Peter Bjorn and John, Beirut, The Shins, and Billy Bragg because of retirement. KEXP is a non-profit organization however, so the move makes sense. Check out their website if you get a chance to hear streaming feeds of exclusive in-studio performances. Or on itunes, they offer upwards of five different podcasts which dole out free songs and videos on a daily basis. (Amazing). Heres a little sample of the now-retired record. I hope it has a condo with a view.

Hot Chip - And I Was a Boy from School (Live in Studio)

The Shackeltons - Your Movement (Live in Studio)

Peter Bjorn and John - Young Folks (Live in Studio)

The Long Winters - Pushover (Live in Studio)

It's time for some new movie alerts! The fabulous Kristen Bell (Veronica Mars, Heroes) stars in the new comedy Forgetting Sarah Marshall which, if I'm not mistaken is another Judd Apatow production the likes of Knocked Up and 40 Yr. Old Virgin. It also stars the loveable Jason Segel (Freaks and Geeks), Mila Kunis, Jonah Hill, and of course, Paul Rudd. Looks like another slightly shallow laugh out loud comedy. Loves it.



Next is the haunting drama Paranoid Park from award-winning director Gus Van Sant.



The dark comedy He Was a Quiet Man starring Christan Slader, Elisha Cuthbert, and William H. Macy.



Woody Allen's newest - Cassandra's Dream



And last but not least the motherfing Dark Knight Trailer! July 18 baby!!



Peace Love and Records.

Girl Talk Murders Seattle

For those of you who aren’t familiar with Girl Talk (AKA Gregg Gillis), I recommend rewarding your ears with his stellar 2006 release Night Ripper. A few swift clicks of the mouse and you can find this bad boy anywhere. Don’t worry nobody obtains it legally – it’s a mixtape, and an amazing one at that. Anyone who can successfully mash up Elton with Biggie (“Smash Your Head”), Kelis with Kansas (“Warm it Up”), The Smashing Pumpkins with Fleetwood Mac with The 69 Boyz (“Overtime”), and Nikka Costa with Daft Punk (“Friday Night”), and make me want to dance has my vote. All 16 tracks on the album flow together like butter; once turned on its nearly impossible to switch it off midstream.

As for the veteran GT fans, searching for new material has proven quite a challenge. I’m very ecstatic to report there’s now a live Girl Talk album floating around in cyberspace entitled Girl Talk Murders Seattle. What better city to record live? And what better location choice (The Showbox), following in the footsteps of Ben Gibbard himself. I’m just sad I missed out on this one; even his commentary with the audience is hilarious! So enjoy this audio delight – covering some of the Night Ripper material live, but also including a significant amount of new shiz I guarantee you have not heard. I also included another GT track I discovered called “LC and Lo,” which I’m pretty positive pays homage to the Laguna Beach “reality” stars in all their teeny-bopper glory. Sorry LC lovers – Team Kristen all the f-ing way.

Girl Talk Murders Seattle (.rar file to be posted later)

Girl Talk – LC and Lo

Do the Bill Gates Shuffle

Being without the internet for several days in this wonderful year of 2008 is like a horrible trek in the Sahara without water. It’s Nicole Ritchie without the paparazzi, Lindsay Lohan without her nose candy, or Michael Jackson without little bo-plastic surgery. For me, it’s like the terrifying experience of not having my iPod within reach. That immediate sinking feeling in your stomach when you realize you are completely cut-off from your life source – and you’re more or less helpless to obtain it. For some reason my stand-in computer (which I was starting to love more than my own) decided to castrate itself in both wireless and LAN capabilities, leaving me stranded with the communication opportunities of a bell-bottom-wearing, war-protesting ABBA lover. Don’t get me wrong, I love to hate disco as much as the next person, but the seventies wasn’t a good era for electronics. And not being able to obsessively check my e-mail/music blogs/facebook for even a couple days was rough. Sleepover with a plethora of Miss Teen South Carolinas rough.

Luckily there are guardian angels, even for the technological inept. And internet cafes. And coffee. I’m not sure caffeine has anything to do with the equation, but it makes me happy so I thought I’d include it. I am online by some divine world wide web grace – thank you Bill Gates (and other, smarter techie geniuses with significantly less business savvy) who helped make this post possible

Since I missed having a Monday Mixtape and there is nothing deliciously new to cover in TV tunes, I’m going back to the good old shuffle button. In fact, I think I’ll make that an institution. Friday, I’m in Shuffle (Cure shout-out). My TV tunes wrap up is moving to sporadic/recurring status, at least until the WGA stops punishing mankind (I’m mad, but supportive). Of course they’ll be the usual bounty of audiogasms in between. So here’s my shout out the richest? man on the planet…. at least this week, until some sultan steals the crown.

Do the Bill Gates Shuffle

Stereophonics – Deadhead

Via Audio – Numb

Rusted Root – Send Me on My Way

Spoon – Be Still My Servant

The Eels – I Like Birds

The Turtles – Happy Together

Tegan and Sara – When I Get Up (Live from Bridge School Benefit)

Interpol – Rest My Chemistry

Stars – Celebration Guns

Patty Griffin – The Long Ride Home

Beck – Strange Apparition

The Cascades - Rhythm of the Falling Rain

Weezer – O Girlfriend

Tom Petty – Here Comes My Girl

Carole King – Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?